Study Life vs Working Life vs Married Life

[Ah Boh]

Once upon a time, when we meet each other after Form 5 or 6, we ask each other "Wat are u studying?" or "Pass exam or not??"

Nowadays, it's "Where are u working?" or "How's ur job?"

Soon, it'll be "U married liao ah?" followed by "How's ur kids??"

After that... eh, let's not go there yet! hehe... :p

So! Life goes on and on. Sometimes I feel that the transition period from being a student to young adult to career woman is a most interesting challenge, whether i can adapt n survive or give up n sulk my life away... :rolleyes:

Watever it is, i will always remember my schooling & college days. Even in the midst of work deadlines or trying to stay in the rat race, I cant help but see both sides of life (studying vs working) like two different sides of the same coin. The question is, which one do u like better?

As they say, there's always pros & cons of any situation...

[Lava Gal]

Once upon a time, when we meet each other after Form 5 or 6, we ask each other "Wat are u studying?" or "Pass exam or not??"

Nowadays, it's "Where are u working?" or "How's ur job?"

Soon, it'll be "U married liao ah?" followed by "How's ur kids??"

After that... eh, let's not go there yet! hehe... :p

good to see part 2 has begun :)

u know wat...like for the past 1yr...most ppl have started asking me the 2nd Q!! haha....me putting my frenster status as 'married' did contribute alot to that =p

and since ppl (esp gals) are getting married young these days...gosh! i just attended my batchmate from Bkt Jll's phase1 pre-clinical yr's wedding in kuantan last wknd...and she is 1 yr younger than me (but has earned her Dd from Uni of dundee)...and its like "OMG...is it really the time for ppl who studies wif me to tie the knot?:blink: "

esp when i myself still feel v much like a child (girl)....hahaha...*shake heads* - but its all personal choice, kan. like if the rite man/woman has come along...then y wait?

on the other extreme...we do see ppl who r specialists (in SGH itself) but unmarried...and happily (erm...some la) spending their days in-and-out in hospital.

[siehjin]

hmmm... if i'm not mistaken, the average age that ppl of our generation want to get married at is about 27-28 years.

my own parents were married at 27, i think. that was late for their generation.

anyway, this is abit off topic... sorry heheh.=)

[ryan_khoo82]

Actually I don't mind postponing the marriage thing till I'm close to my 30s.

I've lots I want to do career-wise before marriage and a permanent relationship is not something that'll help. However I don't mind if the girl has the same idea as I do and that any relationship that we have is simply because we enjoy each other's company at this point in time. Marriage will come naturally when the time is right.

I'm not the one that'll put myself in the way in the event the girl has bigger dreams where I cannot be part of :D Vice versa.

[athena]

my dear lil bro...when you fall in love, you won't be seeing things correctly already :)

[ryan_khoo82]

my dear lil bro...when you fall in love, you won't be seeing things correctly already :)

I know what you mean... lust gets in your eyes :D

So my above post only lasts until some girl really catches my eye :D

Congrats on your "registration". Caught it off your blog.

I need to seriously meet Linda one day ;)

[athena]

teehehehe...thanks...

seriously meet Linda? hmmm...i wonder why? :rolleyes:

[ryan_khoo82]

teehehehe...thanks...

seriously meet Linda? hmmm...i wonder why? :rolleyes:


The 'Wild Things' shot in Redang is the clincher :D Must be KamKuay's picture of the year. Of course how can I not want to meet the stars of the picture.

[athena]

can be arranged...can be arranged!!! :laugh::laugh::laugh:

[singteck]

After that... eh, let's not go there yet! hehe...

I know what is after that :crying:

You will be comparing who have more pains and aches :squeeze:


Such is retirement :crying:

[Ah Boh]

good to see part 2 has begun :)

u know wat...like for the past 1yr...most ppl have started asking me the 2nd Q!! haha....me putting my frenster status as 'married' did contribute alot to that =p

hehe... u put 'married' in ur friendster?? dem funny fella... :eek:

my kolig advise me to start wearing a fake wedding ring to halau d buayas. wonder it it'll work? hehe... maybe i shud drop by p.street n check out those cheap silver/gold ones.

errmm.. ya hor, this is abit off topic but nvm, it's entertaining ya!

I know what is after that :crying:

You will be comparing who have more pains and aches :squeeze:

u poor thing...

i feel for u, my fren. not that i actually know how it feels...

kekeke...

[song cm]

hehe... u put 'married' in ur friendster?? dem funny fella... :eek:

my kolig advise me to start wearing a fake wedding ring to halau d buayas. wonder it it'll work? hehe... maybe i shud drop by p.street n check out those cheap silver/gold ones.

errmm.. ya hor, this is abit off topic but nvm, it's entertaining ya!



u poor thing...

i feel for u, my fren. not that i actually know how it feels...

kekeke...

haha...i heard some buaya target married women as they are the "bored" ones...:laugh:

[Ah Boh]

Actually I don't mind postponing the marriage thing till I'm close to my 30s.

I've lots I want to do career-wise before marriage and a permanent relationship is not something that'll help. However I don't mind if the girl has the same idea as I do and that any relationship that we have is simply because we enjoy each other's company at this point in time. Marriage will come naturally when the time is right.

I'm not the one that'll put myself in the way in the event the girl has bigger dreams where I cannot be part of :D Vice versa.

i cannot help but agree with u. :)

everyone is ambitious nowadays. i mean, its a whole new world n there's so much u can achieve as long as u have youth & strength & determination.

so previously, women normally say marriage/family before career. now, i believe there's a big question mark on dat concept. correct me if im wrong?

hmmm... if i'm not mistaken, the average age that ppl of our generation want to get married at is about 27-28 years.

my own parents were married at 27, i think. that was late for their generation.

anyway, this is abit off topic... sorry heheh.=)

hmm... seems like its a hot topic. maybe i shud change my thread title to "Study Life vs Working Life vs Married Life" ??

wat do u think?

[athena]

u want to?

[Ah Boh]

u want to?

Can I?? :)

[athena]

Can I?? :)
done....:)

[Ah Boh]

done....:)

woohoooo!! now dats wat i call efficiency! :)

thanks a million, dear!

[athena]

:) no worries....now.....where we were on the comparisons? :D

[Ah Boh]

hehe...

i dunno about married life so i'll only say that i enjoy this...

single life + career life = freedom & independent & fun!!

[song cm]

marriage n kids might impact your freedom but they have sure give a totally different level of fun.....:)

[athena]

at the mo, i'll take marriage W/O the kids...hahaha

[song cm]

well...it is just a matter of time...lalalala......:laugh:

[athena]

i'll lalallala for a few more years la...lalallal....

[Ah Boh]

i'll lalallala for a few more years la...lalallal....

:eek: :eek: :eek:

athena in Sound of Music lalalalaa-ing away in the mountains till d sun set...

[athena]

:eek: :eek: :eek:

athena in Sound of Music lalalalaa-ing away in the mountains till d sun set...
sound of music got lalala-ing meh? i tot they just yodle :p

[song cm]

well....a lot can happen in between the lalaing...like...oops....:laugh:

[athena]

if oops happens, i'll send opps to penang for u ok? ;)

[Ah Boh]

:cheesy: i cant help smiling like an idiot in d office, thanks to ur lalala-ing n suddenly ooopps! :cheesy:

u funny fellas brighten up my day lar... :)

[athena]

hehe...so u wanna lala together wif me and song or not? :D

[Ah Boh]

hehe...so u wanna lala together wif me and song or not? :D

why not? we all can go lallala-ing around d tiang lampu singing in d rain.. hehe.. :eek:

[athena]

why not? we all can go lallala-ing around d tiang lampu singing in d rain.. hehe.. :eek:
kewl!!! hehehe....ok...we set date...and get song down here....

[song cm]

if oops happens, i'll send opps to penang for u ok? ;)

haha...don larr...i am still suffering form my 2 ooops....:laugh:

[song cm]

kewl!!! hehehe....ok...we set date...and get song down here....

why don both of u come to penang n sing....:)

[athena]

haha...don larr...i am still suffering form my 2 ooops....:laugh:
one more won't make much difference!!! haha

[ungsutiong]

song cm, athena & ah boh singing ala Sound of Music, with some plots of "lalallal" & sub-plots of "oops"......sing from KL to Penang......looks like the making of a Hindi movie. Keep it going. Don't stop. :laugh:

[Lava Gal]

hehe... u put 'married' in ur friendster?? dem funny fella... :eek:
erm...adalah reasons-nya. esp when u start getting weird messages from people u dont even know...guess what! that did the magic!! it realli almost stopped the irritating messages..hehahaha.
now wats my status on frenster ah...i pun lupa. rembr changed it at one point of time coz sudd many ppl asking me if i was really married...tatz when i realized 'man..i AM getting old, nope? else ppl wont believe these kinda lies" :p


at the mo, i'll take marriage W/O the kids...hahaha

ath dear! u are registered? tatz great news...Congrats to u & GarLoon :D
no time to read blogs like those times...maybe will check urs out sometime soon

[LiLiaN]

my kolig advise me to start wearing a fake wedding ring to halau d buayas. wonder it it'll work? hehe... maybe i shud drop by p.street n check out those cheap silver/gold ones....not sure about buayas but it's definitely a good trick when travelling...
less likely to get hassles to have a ring on your finger... :)

[song cm]

not sure about buayas but it's definitely a good trick when travelling...
less likely to get hassles to have a ring on your finger... :)

haha...u tested the theory?? :laugh:

[LiLiaN]

yeap, and most of the times, it worked, especially when i'm travelling on my own...
although once, when i was in italy, i even had my headphone on, reading a book, wore sunglasses too...
so all the signs of don't-talk-to-me-i-plan-to-ignore-you...
this guy just won't go away, first asking me for time, then my name etc...
pretending i don't understand italian, and that i had to go for the train, i made my escape!

i used to actually wear this gold ring given to me as present from my oldest friend's parents...
here in angmor world, wear it on the left hand means you're married so i wear it on the right lor...
still got whole lot of people asking if i'm married, so got tired of that, and don't wear it anymore...

[Lava Gal]

hehe...guess some people just love to 'interpret' things even when they have no meaning, aye?
like if u wear ring on certain hand...certain finger it means certain things (eg - engaged vs married)..:laugh: while like lilian...someone might just wanna wear one for the sake of wearing it!

[LiLiaN]

i wore it because it was a gift from someone who matters, that's it...
i've known of my friend and her family all my life...
but towards the end, i did get tired of people wondering if i'm married... :confused:
and the ring is not even a plain wedding band, just gold but with motifs on...

[ryan_khoo82]

at the mo, i'll take marriage W/O the kids...hahaha

Haha... remember the protection... whatever the form.

Don't want hubby to mis-fire :D

[Ah Boh]

my boss is an unmarried lady who is very good at her job n hv a successful career. i wonder if marriage/kids will affect a gal's ambition or future career prospects?

[athena]

yes! :( unfortunately.

[Adele]

my boss is an unmarried lady who is very good at her job n hv a successful career. i wonder if marriage/kids will affect a gal's ambition or future career prospects?
not if it's in the girl's ambition! :D 'coz all incorporated into career prospects edi!

[SS2006]

not if it's in the girl's ambition! :D 'coz all incorporated into career prospects edi!
I like your post, Adele.:)
Most of the time, if a married woman's career affected after having kids, it's because of the double-standard treatment from the top. A lot of multinational company now take care of the staff's welfare....and they understand and recognise the importance of balanced family life in their staff....and they provide a lot of flexibility...and the end result is they get better staff work performance, and lower turnover in return. It's all about time-management, single or no children not synonymous to better performance. and longer hours also not synonymous to better performance.

[Ah Boh]

but if ur ambition is way sky high and u wanna get married, with or without kids, i think u gonna sacrifice sum part of ur career rite? U cant go as far or as high as u cud otherwise do without d burden of hubby n family.

i mean, izzit possible to have both d cake n eat it too??

[SS2006]

but if ur ambition is way sky high and u wanna get married, with or without kids, i think u gonna sacrifice sum part of ur career rite? U cant go as far or as high as u cud otherwise do without d burden of hubby n family.

i mean, izzit possible to have both d cake n eat it too??
A lot of very successful women has husband and kids...and there are also a lot of ummarried woman or man who are not so successful in their career too. It all depends on the individual ambition, and talent/skill plus a little bit of luck....no?

[LiLiaN]

definitely need a combo of factors to have a career and manage family life successfully...
i think, esp in this modern society, woman can have both career and family...
but sometimes, there are indeed sceptics who believe they'll start to crack after a while...
and therefore less inclined to give them more responsibility, and therefore less reward/ recognition as due...
this mind set need to be changed to see real impact in my opinion....

[Ah Boh]

hmm... depends on luck n sceptics eh? tough bargain.

[LiLiaN]

if everything in life is easy, then what's the joy in it?
you appreciate the fruit of success more when you've earned it.. :)

[ryan_khoo82]

my boss is an unmarried lady who is very good at her job n hv a successful career. i wonder if marriage/kids will affect a gal's ambition or future career prospects?

Well it should not... I've seen one married woman juggle her career, one 12 year old son, dinners with hubby after work and all the time while pregnant.... and apparently was also planning a moved to be a head of consumer bank...

now that's one hell of a lady

Ath is only complaining coz she just tied the knot :D she'll figure out something later

[song cm]

but if ur ambition is way sky high and u wanna get married, with or without kids, i think u gonna sacrifice sum part of ur career rite? U cant go as far or as high as u cud otherwise do without d burden of hubby n family.

i mean, izzit possible to have both d cake n eat it too??

well...i guess once a woman get married and have kids, their maternal instinct does kick-in and they would be less "career-minded". Of course the society aso places pressure on her to concentrate more on her family, unfortunately

But i guess the most important wld be the hub....i don see why the wife cannot be career orientated if she has the support from the hubby....

[shiruikage]

well...i guess once a woman get married and have kids, their maternal instinct does kick-in and they would be less "career-minded". Of course the society aso places pressure on her to concentrate more on her family, unfortunately

But i guess the most important wld be the hub....i don see why the wife cannot be career orientated if she has the support from the hubby....
getting the support from the hubby is easy. wats tough is getting the support from the children. imagine, the mother stays at work everyday, and the child hardly ever sees her, and thinks that the maid is his/her mother!:eek: thats a tragedy.

[LiLiaN]

how come i have never seen people argued that when a child don't see the father much then the child would take someone else on as father figure? :sus:

[shiruikage]

how come i have never seen people argued that when a child don't see the father much then the child would take someone else on as father figure? :sus:
are u sure lilian? i seen plenty. they call it movie stars. y else the kids (males ussualy) goes bad, and tried to emulate the stars they see in movies. children (boys especially) deals with an absent father by being stoic, which is wat they might think is the proper way a 'man' should act. for the girls, its easy, get a domineering boyfren.

[LiLiaN]

but that's precisely my point... since things can go bad so quickly...
why don't people argue for father to be around more often...
instead of working all the time and just have mother at home...
why don't both parents split their working time half half so to maximise their time with their kids?
why does society usually blame mothers when their children go awol with their behaviour?
can't you see this is only creating more pressure for mothers, that it's difficult for them to be successful with their career...

[TK Ho]

but that's precisely my point... since things can go bad so quickly...
why don't people argue for father to be around more often...
instead of working all the time and just have mother at home...
why don't both parents split their working time half half so to maximise their time with their kids?
why does society usually blame mothers when their children go awol with their behaviour?
can't you see this is only creating more pressure for mothers, that it's difficult for them to be successful with their career...

LiLiaN, that is why society have so called toles of mother and father. If they were to have the same roles, then, maybe the name should be changed to famother or mofather. We need specialisation-mah. Certain roles are better played by certain gender. :noworry:

[LiLiaN]

but no matter how well a role a mother can play, she cannot replace the role of a father...
where is the ground for compromise then..?

don't get me wrong, i'm not a feminist...
i just want to know where the bias lies that in the society, curbs women's career from progressing further...

[shiruikage]

but no matter how well a role a mother can play, she cannot replace the role of a father...
where is the ground for compromise then..?

don't get me wrong, i'm not a feminist...
i just want to know where the bias lies that in the society, curbs women's career from progressing further...
u got me there. i was born into this place, not create it. let alone capable of changing it.

[Chris C]

The thing is, the old attitude is still there,"the wife's place is at home, and the husband's duty is the breadwinner". And often, when a man comes home tired from work, the last thing he wants to get invovled in, is the matters at home, when the wife is supposed to handle it. Sounds familiar?," I'm tired and so stressed from work already......", that keeps the children away from their dad, and the fathers, away from their kids.

That's why the attitude is important nowdays. Parenting is something that should be shared equally, if u want to raise a family. But with the material needs that's so manipulating nowdays, being a good parent and raising kids r getting harder and demanding.

[shiruikage]

The thing is, the old attitude is still there,"the wife's place is at home, and the husband's duty is the breadwinner". And often, when a man comes home tired from work, the last thing he wants to get invovled in, is the matters at home, when the wife is supposed to handle it. Sounds familiar?," I'm tired and so stressed from work already......", that keeps the children away from their dad, and the fathers, away from their kids.

That's why the attitude is important nowdays. Parenting is something that should be shared equally, if u want to raise a family. But with the material needs that's so manipulating nowdays, being a good parent and raising kids r getting harder and demanding.
ahhh, shreds of experience there...;)

[Ah Boh]

Well it should not... I've seen one married woman juggle her career, one 12 year old son, dinners with hubby after work and all the time while pregnant.... and apparently was also planning a moved to be a head of consumer bank...

now that's one hell of a lady

Ath is only complaining coz she just tied the knot :D she'll figure out something later
amazing story bout dat lady, maybe i shud meet her one day n find out d secret to her success for my future use.

well...i guess once a woman get married and have kids, their maternal instinct does kick-in and they would be less "career-minded". Of course the society aso places pressure on her to concentrate more on her family, unfortunately

But i guess the most important wld be the hub....i don see why the wife cannot be career orientated if she has the support from the hubby....
ahhh.. therein lies d crux of the matter. hubby's approval eh?

[song cm]

amazing story bout dat lady, maybe i shud meet her one day n find out d secret to her success for my future use.


ahhh.. therein lies d crux of the matter. hubby's approval eh?

don say approval larr...blessing is a better word.....:)

[funkmeister]

amazing story bout dat lady, maybe i shud meet her one day n find out d secret to her success for my future use...


Would this be Bridget Lai (Alliance Bank) by any chance?

[ryan_khoo82]

Would this be Bridget Lai (Alliance Bank) by any chance?

Hahaha... close but not her. The other lady below her.

[Ah Boh]

don say approval larr...blessing is a better word.....:)
very funny... ;)

[song cm]

very funny... ;)

honestly...due to rising costs of living, most hub would prefer their wifey to contribute to total income as well.....:(