Royal Rumble 1

[alfred98]

Guys this thread no aim one so cannot go ouut of topic. U can write what ever U feels like and always out topic one okkk. Rumble for Sitiawan Wrestling Federation (SWF). Can start to bulit your muscle first to come here ok. Or else get whack here don't blame meeee ok.. :mad:

[song cm]

who are u? hulk hogan kah?

[JC]

The way he writes, sounds like batista.. :p

[alfred98]

who are u? hulk hogan kah?
Hulk Hogan grand son leh don't mess okkk. :D

[Oddfather]

alfred98....welcome back to the Forum and good to see you in here again.

[Chris C]

Good to have u back in the forum again, doctor. :) ( in future, can get discount from your clinic ah?) :D

[Dino]

Good to have u back in the forum again, doctor. :) ( in future, can get discount from your clinic ah?) :D

Waaaa.....having another baby ah?? Tabik!!! :p

[Alkapocino]

Good to have u back in the forum again, doctor. :) ( in future, can get discount from your clinic ah?) :D
Discount I don't think so, but VAS yes! :laugh:

[TK Ho]

Discount I don't think so, but VAS yes! :laugh:

Alka, what's VAS?

[Alkapocino]

Alka, what's VAS?
Now, that's something you didn't pay attention in your class! :laugh:

Value Added Service...heard of that?

[TK Ho]

Now, that's something you didn't pay attention in your class! :laugh:

Value Added Service...heard of that?

Not heard before. But VAT yes-lah.

[Chris C]

Waaaa.....having another baby ah?? Tabik!!! :p
:p .......having baby onli can see loctor meh? Other sakit-sakit also need to see loctor mah..... :p

[Chris C]

Hey Alky, care to share how much value is added to the service???? :rolleyes:

And TK Ho, apa itu VAT pulak?

[Dino]

:p .......having baby onli can see loctor meh? Other sakit-sakit also need to see loctor mah..... :p

If sakit means too late liao....baby coming already!!

[TK Ho]

Hey Alky, care to share how much value is added to the service???? :rolleyes:

And TK Ho, apa itu VAT pulak?

VAT=......tax. (don't know what V and A are for) Tax paid on things here in UK, something like Singapore.

[Chris C]

If sakit means too late liao....baby coming already!!
:laugh: .........bukan itu sakit lah.......why u asyik tok about baby? U wan one ah?

[SS2006]

:laugh: .........bukan itu sakit lah.......why u asyik tok about baby? U wan one ah?
Dino now gatal mahu baby liao...see all his recent posts :p

[Dino]

Dino now gatal mahu baby liao...see all his recent posts :p

Tak mahu!!! Manyak mahal loooorrr!!! If gatal also i go beli minyak cap kapak and put on the spot that gatal.......

[SS2006]

Tak mahu!!! Manyak mahal loooorrr!!! If gatal also i go beli minyak cap kapak and put on the spot that gatal.......
Not as mahal as all your toys and gadgets...kids good long term investment.
At the most make them sign IOU wif their blood, lorr... :eek:

[Dino]

Not as mahal as all your toys and gadgets...kids good long term investment.
At the most make them sign IOU wif their blood, lorr... :eek:

Wow.....good for you!!! Must make them sign their life over to you!!!

[alfred98]

Good to have u back in the forum again, doctor. :) ( in future, can get discount from your clinic ah?) :D
Hi Chris! Back in sitiawan already liao. How's the oxygen in CH ah. :D

[alfred98]

If sakit means too late liao....baby coming already!!
Dino! Where's your baby leh. Ah! Oh! U R single or gone already like us? :D

[Dino]

Dino! Where's your baby leh. Ah! Oh! U R single or gone already like us? :D

Single and proud!!! :eek:

[Oddfather]

Dino! Where's your baby leh. Ah! Oh! U R single or gone already like us? :D
please indicate timing of singleness... :eek:

[Chris C]

Hi Chris! Back in sitiawan already liao. How's the oxygen in CH ah. :D
Hi, doctor....yeap, back safe and 'sound' in S'wan......the oxygen in C.H., boleh lah, definitely better than here......but almost hali-hali hujan... :D

[alfred98]

Single and proud!!! :eek:
Good boy Dino. Remain that as long as U can okkk. Sometime I regard getting married so fast leh. Initially thought ok but after being exposed to the real world by my bachelor friend. I really envied then ok. My advice if want to be single must enjoy life ok. Like Born to live not live to boring... :D

[alfred98]

Hi, doctor....yeap, back safe and 'sound' in S'wan......the oxygen in C.H., boleh lah, definitely better than here......but almost hali-hali hujan... :D
Same here also mah U thought Sitiawan desert mehh... :D

[Chris C]

Same here also mah U thought Sitiawan desert mehh... :D
...at least not as bad as in C.H. loh.....there, practically non-stop....Mr.Sun playing hide and seek......merajuk most of the time, don't wanna come out....

[alfred98]

...at least not as bad as in C.H. loh.....there, practically non-stop....Mr.Sun playing hide and seek......merajuk most of the time, don't wanna come out....
LIke that all the veg and flower gone lah... :D

[Dino]

Good boy Dino. Remain that as long as U can okkk. Sometime I regard getting married so fast leh. Initially thought ok but after being exposed to the real world by my bachelor friend. I really envied then ok. My advice if want to be single must enjoy life ok. Like Born to live not live to boring... :D

Noted!!! :)

[Chris C]

LIke that all the veg and flower gone lah... :D
....flowers r all hokay, they're under the plastic shade.......veg a bit susah lah with so much rain......

[Chris C]

Single and proud!!! :eek:
Good morning good boy......................... :sick: :p

[TIGERWOOD]

loctor, baru kahwin berapa lama, sudah start gatal ah? kononnya mahu jadi bachelor lagi.

[Dino]

Good morning good boy......................... :sick: :p

:p :p

[alfred98]

loctor, baru kahwin berapa lama, sudah start gatal ah? kononnya mahu jadi bachelor lagi.
That the normal dream leh for all the boys okkkk. Not wet dream mah. :D

[SS2006]

That the normal dream leh for all the boys okkkk. Not wet dream mah. :D
That's human nature, have this want that...always wondering what could have been...missing what could have happened...
I personally dun regret marrying early...but i regret not dating earlier...so envy people who married their childhood lovers...who start dating from student days, then get married, have children...they have so many memories together...
But even if i had known my husband earlier, i dun think i would have fallen for him at that time when he was still a student. I always find working man more mature, more attractive, more glamorous, got more C :eek: So i guess fate brought us together at the right time. :)
So if you have chosen wisely which road to travel, do not have any regret...try to make the best the path you have chosen, remove any obstacle that comes between. There are so many roads out there, so many could have beens...even if you have chosen another road, you would still be wondering about other roads...

[Dino]

That's human nature, have this want that...always wondering what could have been...missing what could have happened...
I personally dun regret marrying early...but i regret not dating earlier...so envy people who married their childhood lovers...who start dating from student days, then get married, have children...they have so many memories together...
But even if i had known my husband earlier, i dun think i would have fallen for him at that time when he was still a student. I always find working man more mature, more attractive, more glamorous, got more C :eek: So i guess fate brought us together at the right time. :)
So if you have chosen wisely which road to travel, do not have any regret...try to make the best the path you have chosen, remove any obstacle that comes between. There are so many roads out there, so many could have beens...even if you have chosen another road, you would still be wondering about other roads...

I agree....its your life, live it as your own...I don't aim to please people, in which, i live my life according to their standards. If they want me to live the life they dreamed they had better chance in asking an elephant to fly!!

[Chris C]

I agree....its your life, live it as your own...I don't aim to please people, in which, i live my life according to their standards. If they want me to live the life they dreamed they had better chance in asking an elephant to fly!!
.....i din know u knew Dumbo personnally....... :p

[Dino]

.....i din know u knew Dumbo personnally....... :p

Sorry ah.....i don't know the story of Dumbo...

[Chris C]

Sorry ah.....i don't know the story of Dumbo...
...go and rent this cartoon movie from Disney.....

[SS2006]

...go and rent this cartoon movie from Disney.....
Dumbo too sad...Dino will start crying again.

[SS2006]

Hey Alf...your comment says good one, but why you give me red? :worried:
Wrong click?

[alfred98]

That's human nature, have this want that...always wondering what could have been...missing what could have happened...
I personally dun regret marrying early...but i regret not dating earlier...so envy people who married their childhood lovers...who start dating from student days, then get married, have children...they have so many memories together...
But even if i had known my husband earlier, i dun think i would have fallen for him at that time when he was still a student. I always find working man more mature, more attractive, more glamorous, got more C :eek: So i guess fate brought us together at the right time. :)
So if you have chosen wisely which road to travel, do not have any regret...try to make the best the path you have chosen, remove any obstacle that comes between. There are so many roads out there, so many could have beens...even if you have chosen another road, you would still be wondering about other roads...
Wah very deep one leh. Marriage for me is agreement for life. Without marriage man will be wondering around donating sperm along the way. Then who's going to take responsible for the off spring lor. So man come out with this institution called marriage, this to prevent certain man have too many off spring for their looks or built. This I think happen in the prehistoric era which the most powerful and hansem get the girl lor.
So modern man make it equal distribution for all man to share lor. But U see this modern man still have the same biological instinct like the cave man lah. So don't blame the man if some time they use the wrong brain to think and act lor. I always say if the man behave differently from others I think that fellow won't be herelah. As Darwin theory Survival of the Fittest. :sus:

[alfred98]

Hey Alf...your comment says good one, but why you give me red? :worried:
Wrong click?
Ah yah ah sori how to delete that leh. sori.. :o

[Chris C]

..Dino will start crying again.
....now this will be the day!.......Dino hor..... :p

[Dino]

Hey Alf...your comment says good one, but why you give me red? :worried:
Wrong click?

Fixed.

[Dino]

....now this will be the day!.......Dino hor..... :p

I don't like Disney cartoon nowadays....

[Chris C]

I don't like Disney cartoon nowadays....
.....but this cartoon was from yester yrs......how come u don't like them leh?

[Dino]

.....but this cartoon was from yester yrs......how come u don't like them leh?

Outgrown them already i think.....now i only like violent cartoons!!! :o

[Chris C]

Outgrown them already i think.....now i only like violent cartoons!!! :o
....oic......those with sexy jap girls???? :rolleyes:

[Dino]

....oic......those with sexy jap girls???? :rolleyes:

No....you saw Kill Bill 1 or not...there was a clip of ultra violent killing scene in anime....those are great!!!

[Chris C]

No....you saw Kill Bill 1 or not...there was a clip of ultra violent killing scene in anime....those are great!!!
Me, Disney fan and all those lovely dovey cartoon :o .......have not seen any violent wan......

[siewjang]

Fixed.
:confused: Wah, can fixed wan ah? If like this can fix mine or not?

[Dino]

:confused: Wah, can fixed wan ah? If like this can fix mine or not?

If i have concrete evidence that it was a mistake......

[alfred98]

Fixed.
TQ almost sweating here lah. Shirlene coming with a broom already lor. :p

[alfred98]

Outgrown them already i think.....now i only like violent cartoons!!! :o
Got that one cartoon lah...wanna see.. :D

[alfred98]

:confused: Wah, can fixed wan ah? If like this can fix mine or not?
Which one leh face?nose? boobs? :D

[Dino]

Got that one cartoon lah...wanna see.. :D

Hentai ah??? :rolleyes:

[alfred98]

Hentai ah??? :rolleyes:
yah and the naked wrestling also. :blink:

[Dino]

yah and the naked wrestling also. :blink:

Hahhaaha....i want stylish and voilent wan....go see Kill Bill and you know what i mean...

[alfred98]

Hahhaaha....i want stylish and voilent wan....go see Kill Bill and you know what i mean...
Can get from net or not sitiawan got no pirated VCD lah. :cool:

[Dino]

Can get from net or not sitiawan got no pirated VCD lah. :cool:

Not sure.... :unsure:

[Chris C]

Can get from net or not sitiawan got no pirated VCD lah. :cool:
Billion got lah.....i don't know whether they have Kill Bill or not, but i bought quite alot of cartoon movies for lima linggit each...

[alfred98]

Billion got lah.....i don't know whether they have Kill Bill or not, but i bought quite alot of cartoon movies for lima linggit each...
For adult one where got leh. :D

[Chris C]

For adult one where got leh. :D
:laugh: ...that gua donno.....

[Dino]

For adult one where got leh. :D

Kill Bill not adult wan laaa....its a good movie....

[alfred98]

Kill Bill not adult wan laaa....its a good movie....
Oh sori I thought the title looks like that one mah. :D

[Dino]

Oh sori I thought the title looks like that one mah. :D

Go see it...got Kill Bill 1 and Kill Bill 2....very good movie.....

[alfred98]

Go see it...got Kill Bill 1 and Kill Bill 2....very good movie.....
Cow boy one leh. I think I saw it before.. :D

[Dino]

Cow boy one leh. I think I saw it before.. :D

First one was Japanese.....second one...errrr....a little bit western setting.

[alfred98]

Ok royal rumble leh got enough muscle already or not come and join leh. Here can punch, kick, swear and mar chau war ok.. :D

[Alkapocino]

Ok royal rumble leh got enough muscle already or not come and join leh. Here can punch, kick, swear and mar chau war ok.. :D
Mar sie nok chau war ar?

[alfred98]

Mar sie nok chau war ar?
Neh li kong lor... :D

[LiLiaN]

please note that while free topic reins with this thread, do observe forum etiquette.

[alfred98]

please note that while free topic reins with this thread, do observe forum etiquette.
Ok queen LiLian we try to be nice guy here...Wanna rumble?

[TK Ho]

Ok queen LiLian we try to be nice guy here...Wanna rumble?

The bell's started. Ting..ting...

[alfred98]

The bell's started. Ting..ting...
So I heard that your M...f.... punch my son that day. I'm gonna s... your as... like a ball ah. Don't mess with me... :D

[Alkapocino]

please note that while free topic reins with this thread, do observe forum etiquette.
That means no punches below the belt right? Okay got it. :o

[TK Ho]

That means no punches below the belt right? Okay got it. :o

In WWE, it's called low blow. So, low blows are illegal, it seems.

[Alkapocino]

In WWE, it's called low blow. So, low blows are illegal, it seems.
Only doctor alfred98 got license for the low blow. You ade lesen tak?

[alfred98]

Only doctor alfred98 got license for the low blow. You ade lesen tak?
Dr TK HO got lesen to sunat U lor... :D

[TK Ho]

Dr TK HO got lesen to sunat U lor... :D

Yeah Alka, FOC, u want or not?

[alfred98]

Yeah Alka, FOC, u want or not?
Talking about sunat alka running away liao, that small fold of skin veri important for chinese leh.. :D

[TK Ho]

Talking about sunat alka running away liao, that small fold of skin veri important for chinese leh.. :D

Alka, hello... Alka, where r U?

[alfred98]

Alka, hello... Alka, where r U?
Drinking champage in the sex forum leh... :D

[Alkapocino]

Ai yo yo...two doctors lain macam punya. One play with his fingers and the other one play with someone else finger. How lah! HELP!!!!!! :eek:

[alfred98]

Sunat and liwat U ok.. don't mess lor.

[Alkapocino]

Ooouch....I boh chun liao! :crying:

[alfred98]

Ooouch....I boh chun liao! :crying:
Pendek by few cm ok lah. :D

[TK Ho]

Pendek by few cm ok lah. :D

A few cm-ah? How many percent oreadi? Stistically and functionally significant-ah? :rolleyes:

[Alkapocino]

A few cm-ah? How many percent oreadi? Stistically and functionally significant-ah? :rolleyes:
I really hope Dino will wake up and help me whack you really hard with his bat.

[alfred98]

A few cm-ah? How many percent oreadi? Stistically and functionally significant-ah? :rolleyes:
Yah hor few cm horse hilang already.. :D

[TK Ho]

I really hope Dino will wake up and help me whack you really hard with his bat.

OK guys, I better go before Dino arrives with his bat. No S&M for me please.

[alfred98]

Where R U Alka, alka... :D

[Alkapocino]

What's up doc?

[alfred98]

What's up doc?
Wake up already- sun behind your head liao...no need to work meh saturday leh. :)

[Alkapocino]

Wake up already- sun behind your head liao...no need to work meh saturday leh. :)
basketball...didn't sleep the whole last night...gila forum, today woke up at 8am by my kid!!! :(

[alfred98]

basketball...didn't sleep the whole last night...gila forum, today woke up at 8am by my kid!!! :(
Dreaming leh told U what.. addict addict.. :D :D

[Alkapocino]

Dreaming leh told U what.. addict addict.. :D :D
blame it on andrewh........ :p

[alfred98]

blame it on andrewh........ :p
So he got the laicy underwear for him self lahh. Can fit meh.. :D

[Alkapocino]

So he got the laicy underwear for him self lahh. Can fit meh.. :D
Cover half....expose the other half....like pau nangka only. LOL! :laugh:

[alfred98]

Cover half....expose the other half....like pau nangka only. LOL! :laugh:
No lah one leg also cannot go in lah. I know leh that underwear where got big size one leh.. :D

[alfred98]

Talking about virginity. Virginity usually becomes issue when in case of rape, marriage and divorce and sometime involving maid lor.
For medical term is just intact of hymen, but in actual sense rape means touching of vulva without penetration also consider raped. With this hymen usually intact lor. But in court of law this mean case being thrown out no case leh. And the poor girl cannot claimed raped but sexual abuse case lor.
So it is actually very dificult to prove raped in non virgin girl. Unless there is present of semen and by DNA analysis, which is rarely used unless the victim is died... :(

[siewjang]

Anyhow, sexual abused is better than rape right?

[alfred98]

Anyhow, sexual abused is better than rape right?
Don't say that term leh. This term being use freely when a case cannot be proven rape and sexual abuse is very often use in child abuse lor. :(

[Oddfather]

blame it on andrewh........ :p
ooii, you think I complain department, ar!!! :mad:

[alfred98]

ooii, you think I complain department, ar!!! :mad:
No leh rehab centre lah. :D :D

[TIGERWOOD]

Talking about virginity. Virginity usually becomes issue when in case of rape, marriage and divorce and sometime involving maid lor.
For medical term is just intact of hymen, but in actual sense rape means touching of vulva without penetration also consider raped. With this hymen usually intact lor. But in court of law this mean case being thrown out no case leh. And the poor girl cannot claimed raped but sexual abuse case lor.
So it is actually very dificult to prove raped in non virgin girl. Unless there is present of semen and by DNA analysis, which is rarely used unless the victim is died... :(

loctor, since when lu sudah pandai pandai jadi loyar, gua sudah pening oh. ada panadol ah? :o

[alfred98]

loctor, since when lu sudah pandai pandai jadi loyar, gua sudah pening oh. ada panadol ah? :o
Since I becomes loctor lor. U see my job is seing rape case and writing report. If we suspect there is rape occurs the police will spring into action lor catching the culprit lor. So the culprit faith in my hand lor. I conti later ok got to go to get my 3 years old for school.. :(

[alfred98]

Ophs no need liao..
Ok so the Inspector sometime male sometime female will asked us-Ah loctor ah ada rogol keh, Oh tunggu lah nanti leh saya perlu check dulu mah. Ah ok ada rogol leh fresh tear pada pukul 7 malam position. So the Police will phone their squat- Hello, Hello ah sudah confirm leh comfirm ada rape U orang pergi ambil dia lor, aiyah tangkap dia lah... So loctor ah saya mahu oficial report ok. So I said tunggu lah hantar specimen ini, kalau tidak kita kalah loh dalam kes ini leh..
I think that is facts of life which I explained from the actual place and conversation. I know some of U won't like the way I did but if U don't like just too bad ingnored my post but don't red me okkk dealll :)

[TIGERWOOD]

Ophs no need liao..
Ok so the Inspector sometime male sometime female will asked us-Ah loctor ah ada rogol keh, Oh tunggu lah nanti leh saya perlu check dulu mah. Ah ok ada rogol leh fresh tear pada pukul 7 malam position. So the Police will phone their squat- Hello, Hello ah sudah confirm leh comfirm ada rape U orang pergi ambil dia lor, aiyah tangkap dia lah... So loctor ah saya mahu oficial report ok. So I said tunggu lah hantar specimen ini, kalau tidak kita kalah loh dalam kes ini leh..
I think that is facts of life which I explained from the actual place and conversation. I know some of U won't like the way I did but if U don't like just too bad ingnored my post but don't red me okkk dealll :)

loctor, i think NYPD need your services more leh. i heard there's vacancy for loctor pakar rogol lah.

[alfred98]

loctor, i think NYPD need your services more leh. i heard there's vacancy for loctor pakar rogol lah.
Durai wan to join leh come lah.... :p

[TIGERWOOD]

Durai wan to join leh come lah.... :p

no more calling names ah, or else alka got to start another withdrawal syndrom tread liau. harimau!!!!!!!

[siewjang]

Ophs no need liao..
Ok so the Inspector sometime male sometime female will asked us-Ah loctor ah ada rogol keh, Oh tunggu lah nanti leh saya perlu check dulu mah. Ah ok ada rogol leh fresh tear pada pukul 7 malam position. So the Police will phone their squat- Hello, Hello ah sudah confirm leh comfirm ada rape U orang pergi ambil dia lor, aiyah tangkap dia lah... So loctor ah saya mahu oficial report ok. So I said tunggu lah hantar specimen ini, kalau tidak kita kalah loh dalam kes ini leh..
Is there many rape cases in Manjung/Sitiawan? Do you do post mortem too?

[alfred98]

no more calling names ah, or else alka got to start another withdrawal syndrom tread liau. harimau!!!!!!!
Hahahahhahahha :D :D

[alfred98]

Is there many rape cases in Manjung/Sitiawan? Do you do post mortem too?
Yah some time about 1/week. Post mortem never done before because I'm in O&G department. Usually done by A&E medical officer but in murder case the forensic pathologist from Ipoh will do.....

[SS2006]

Yah some time about 1/week. Post mortem never done before because I'm in O&G department. Usually done by A&E medical officer but in murder case the forensic pathologist from Ipoh will do.....
I thought you also do paktorlogi :laugh:

[siewjang]

1 case per week? Ouch! :squeeze:

[alfred98]

I thought you also do paktorlogi :laugh:
That is part time job lah.. :)

[TIGERWOOD]

That is part time job lah.. :)

loctor, do you charge per hour or per case? is it as expensive as golf lesson ah? :wacko:

[alfred98]

loctor, do you charge per hour or per case? is it as expensive as golf lesson ah? :wacko:
FOC lah gahment mah :(

[siewjang]

Wah, like this rugi betul la. But got free viewing hor.

[alfred98]

Wah, like this rugi betul la. But got free viewing hor.
Yah yah see everyday also excited lah.. :cool:

[TIGERWOOD]

FOC lah gahment mah :(

wah! other than loctor, lauyer, nypd, you also can do patologi and charity ah? :wacko: :wacko: :wacko:

[alfred98]

wah! other than loctor, lauyer, nypd, you also can do patologi and charity ah? :wacko: :wacko: :wacko:
They can olny talk but no seeing. Whereas me talk, see and action also.. :D

[TingMS]

They can olny talk but no seeing. Whereas me talk, see and action also.. :D


barger, if can I think I also want to switch profession liao... :laugh:

[alfred98]

barger, if can I think I also want to switch profession liao... :laugh:
heheheheheh ROFL :eek: :eek:

[alfred98]

http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c47/alf98/DSCF0065.jpg
This young doctor writing down prescrition after giving injection to her patient. The behind boy is the patient lah after that jab.... :D :D

[siewjang]

barger, if can I think I also want to switch profession liao... :laugh:
So, you want to ukur there also issit?

[siewjang]

This young doctor writing down prescrition after giving injection to her patient. The behind boy is the patient lah after that jab.... :D :D
Wrong jab la. I think he's going to faint. :amazed:

[alfred98]

Wrong jab la. I think he's going to faint. :amazed:
No lah. He just said stupid doctor giving injection although I'm not sick to his mum...

[alfred98]

http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c47/alf98/P1010038.jpg
That's my cousin brother wedding in CyberView lodge resort last Sunday which I attended lor....

[alfred98]

http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c47/alf98/P1010027.jpg
The bridegroom with the father. That's my 3rd uncle as my father the youngest son lor... :D

[Chris C]

Hey Alfred, your cousin looks a bit like Page's hubby lah, Dr. Chang.....

[Alkapocino]

Hey Alfred, your cousin looks a bit like Page's hubby lah, Dr. Chang.....
You better confirm with Page...could be the same person!!! :eek:

[Chris C]

You better confirm with Page...could be the same person!!! :eek:
:laugh: ........She'll say, "my hubby more hemson!"......

[Alkapocino]

:laugh: ........She'll say, "my hubby more hemson!"......
Please tell her, "Your mama is pretty, what happened to you!" :p

[Chris C]

Please tell her, "Your mama is pretty, what happened to you!" :p
....she'll answer, "my mama is pretty, me? I'm beeeeaaaaauuuuutiiiiiiiiifuuuuullllll!... :p

[Alkapocino]

....she'll answer, "my mama is pretty, me? I'm beeeeaaaaauuuuutiiiiiiiiifuuuuullllll!... :p
:laugh:

[alfred98]

Hey Alfred, your cousin looks a bit like Page's hubby lah, Dr. Chang.....
Which Chang leh. Is it hte Gloden city son ah...
U see my cousin was in the Cleo magazine 50th most eligible bachelor lah keng leh.. :D

[t-wei]

Which Chang leh. Is it hte Gloden city son ah...
U see my cousin was in the Cleo magazine 50th most eligible bachelor lah keng leh.. :D

haha and i'm in the cleo january 2006 issue under careers

[Chris C]

Which Chang leh. Is it hte Gloden city son ah...
U see my cousin was in the Cleo magazine 50th most eligible bachelor lah keng leh.. :D
Chang Sek Kim?.....your wifey should know him.....

[alfred98]

haha and i'm in the cleo january 2006 issue under careers
Ha is it The most eligible career women!!!! :eek: :laugh: :laugh:

[t-wei]

Ha is it The most eligible career women!!!! :eek: :laugh: :laugh:

don't know about that....but u can read it... ;)

[alfred98]

Chang Sek Kim?.....your wifey should know him.....
Chee! Don't know lehhh. He's where now? :D

[Chris C]

Chee! Don't know lehhh. He's where now? :D
....in Ipoh......

[Chris C]

haha and i'm in the cleo january 2006 issue under careers
Hey t-wei, congrats leh.....not everyone can make it into magazines.....will get one copy then....

[JC]

haha and i'm in the cleo january 2006 issue under careers
Serious-kah?? Scan & post here-lah... Gua pun mau tengok...

[Alkapocino]

haha and i'm in the cleo january 2006 issue under careers
www./cleo/jan2006/careers/bikinis section?

*bet alfred98 will click on the link...... :p

[t-wei]

Serious-kah?? Scan & post here-lah... Gua pun mau tengok...

wait ar..

[JC]

wait ar..
How long?

[t-wei]

How long?

aiyah my colleague took the mag home....i don't know where la....u go beli one la..very cheap on RM5

[JC]

Aiyo! You crazy-meh? Guy buy Cleo??

[alfred98]

www./cleo/jan2006/careers/bikinis section?

*bet alfred98 will click on the link...... :p
Dey this site U created one ah-curiosity kill the doc..heheheh :D

[alfred98]

Aiyo! You crazy-meh? Guy buy Cleo??
Guys go online cleo lah... :p

[Alkapocino]

Dey this site U created one ah-curiosity kill the doc..heheheh :D
Hahahaha..at least it paved the way to Cleo online. Hehehehe.....

[alfred98]

http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c47/alf98/P1010031.jpg
Pissed off face!! Had to wait for 3 hours before dinner start and she's eating biscuit in the dinner waiting for then top start. Why ah KL time is it???

[Alkapocino]

Pissed off face!! Had to wait for 3 hours before dinner start and she's eating biscuit in the dinner waiting for then top start. Why ah KL time is it???
Wow..can put this pics in the Cleo Family lah!!!!! :laugh:

[alfred98]

Photografer can join ah... :D

[Alkapocino]

Photografer can join ah... :D
In the Sex Maniac column..want or not? :laugh:

[alfred98]

In the Sex Maniac column..want or not? :laugh:
Art also loh... :laugh: :laugh:

[siewjang]

Wah, is time to contest for family pic again, guys. This year we have a new contestant. Alfred!!! oh... and TK Ho... and Leslie Ho.... wah andrewh also.

[TIGERWOOD]

Photografer can join ah... :D

at least half naked then can join loh. sure laku one. :eek: :eek:

[alfred98]

Got so many spare tyre still want meh.. :p

[TIGERWOOD]

Got so many spare tyre still want meh.. :p

very good loh. no need to buy tilam mah. tilam very dabgerous oh, remember anwar?

[alfred98]

very good loh. no need to buy tilam mah. tilam very dabgerous oh, remember anwar?
:laugh: :laugh:

[alfred98]

Rooster in the Year of Dog 2006 Constellations (Stars)Tai Yang(太阳), Tian Kong(天空), Jie Sha(劫杀). Avoid disputes, Rumours, Unexpected financial loss. DispositionThe Rooster is good-hearted and gentle. Handles matters honestly and does not like stirring up trouble. They often neglects feeling of other people and speak without caution. Very often, he does not know what he says and do has already offended people thus causing him to have bad human relations. On the exterior, he likes to start something new just in order to be different. In reality, he is quite conservative. Life for the Rooster is calm and steady without having to worry about clothing and food. The female rooster is virtuous and looks after the household, takes care of the husband and teaches the children. He is a decisive person and do not believes in others easily. He likes to exaggerate and very often, more talk than work. Therefore, he is advisable seek employment rather than running their own business. He should not do complicated work as it may throw them into confusion making him feels helpless. He is good at dealing with difficult situations and it is where they are successful. For love aspect, opposite party dare not be too intimate with the Rooster because of their exaggerating character and high expectations. MarriageThe Rooster and the Cow is a perfect match because both are conservative in nature and gets along well. The Snake match is good because the Snake can offer their wisdom. The Rooster and Rooster or Dragon will be an ideal match too. Avoid matches with Rabbit as the Rabbit cannot tolerate Rooster’s exaggerated character and not down to earth actions causing separation in the end. LuckFor the Rooster, the female has an average luck this year. She has to depend on herself to work hard, then she will reap profits otherwise, she will have a hard time this year. Be cautious of what you say or do as this may cause arguments and misunderstandings to arise. Guard against losing personal items. There will be disputes between husband and wife. Do not interfere in matters that are not related to your family. The Male Rooster’s luck is entirely opposite. The lucky constellation is favorable to those who want career advancement. He will achieve good results. CareerFor him, he will reap what he has sow. For her, she will have to watch quietly and wait for opportunity. Regardless of how hard you strive, it will not help you yield success. It is best to plan this year and execute it when the next year comes. If investing in a business is inevitable, seek partners who are born year of Snake, Cow and Dragon. With these partners, you are able to draw assistance from their good luck. Fortune LuckHe has good luck in making money this year. For unexpected wealth(lucky draw, Toto, 4D), pay attention in Spring season and bet on numbers related to oneself like house number, telephone, car license and etc. The Female Rooster luck is average. There is no gaming luck. If she wants to bet on 4D lottery and Toto or visit gambling establishments, it is advisable to find out the auspicious positions and numbers.
Copyright © 2006 by Master Gwee
Fulu Geomancy Centre 349 Geylang Road Singapore 389370
Tel : (65) 6841 7555 Fax : (65) 6842 7555 Website :www.orientalfortune21.com
Email : orientalfortune21@yahoo.com.sg
HealthThere is a presence of a bad constellation. One must take good care of health. Even though it is a small ailment, do not ignore. Seek medical advice immediately otherwise the consequence is inconceivable. Do more outdoor exercise, have a balanced diet. Especially during the Summer season, avoid traveling to countries that are having epidemic diseases. RomanceA word of caution for those in a relationship: do not quarrel over trivial matters. Treat each other with due respect and politeness. There will be marriage this year. For those who are still single, the Peach Blossom constellation appears in lunar calendar May. You may find your ideal partner. AcademicThe morale is low and it affects the studies this year. Go outdoors and have a breather. It may help to uplift your moods. Do not be worried over school work. Relax and be jovial while spending time with friends. Seek help from classmates or teachers if you encounter difficulties in your studies. Ways to avoid disastersVisit www.orientalfortune21.com to seek for answers or email Master Gwee @ orientalfortune21@yahoo.com.sg for guidance.

Auspicious Months Lunar Calendar March, April and December Inauspicious Months Lunar Calendar February, September and November

[TIGERWOOD]

Auspicious Months Lunar Calendar March, April and December Inauspicious Months Lunar Calendar February, September and November[/QUOTE]


loctor, since when you change job to fortune teller. charges expensive ah? :p :p

[Alkapocino]

Alfred98 has one big mother hen at home!!! Must be pretty good year for the family.....hahaha. :laugh:

[alfred98]

But U see he is advice to seek employment then own bussiness. I think better sell this centre to my wife leh like this.... :D

[siewjang]

:unsure: Rooster and Rabbit this year no good leh.

[alfred98]

:unsure: Rooster and Rabbit this year no good leh.
SJ U R which year leh???

[Alkapocino]

But U see he is advice to seek employment then own bussiness. I think better sell this centre to my wife leh like this.... :D
Then ask your wife to pay you 7 figure salary per annum! :laugh:

[alfred98]

Then ask your wife to pay you 7 figure salary per annum! :laugh:
Wah that much money she got ah. Wondering where she kept the money ah??? :sus:

[siewjang]

SJ U R which year leh???
Rabbit lo. :(

[Alkapocino]

Rabbit lo. :(
Ai ya...you must check see whether the rooster is a kampung rooster or not. If it's a kampung rooster, still ngam one!!! :D

[alfred98]

Rabbit in the Year of Dog 2006 Constellations (Stars)Tian Wei(天危), Long De(龙德), Zi Wei(紫微). Grasps hold of the golden opportunity, let riches and treasures into the house, career development is favourable. DispositionThe Rabbit is noble and elegant. They handle matters with care. When it comes to emotions, they are fickle minded and cannot stay faithful to their partner. They are down to earth and do not like taking risks. They are willing to undertake a project provided the terms are 100% secure. The Rabbit’s human relations are good and friendly. Their finance managing is average. They lack discipline in punctuality. The female rabbit loves to read and is full of empathy. When someone needs helps, they are very glad to extend a helping hand. They have always yearned for a tranquil life. The Rabbit is full of emotions; they get over broken relationships very fast. This is where they get attraction from the opposite sex. Their six senses are strong and it is their protective amulet. They seemed to predict what is going around them and they are well prepared in advance. For the love aspect, men and women are romantic but the female is especially gentle and careful. In their marriage, there are not much of conflicts. MarriageThe Rabbit and the Goat is an ideal match as they appreciate each other’s virtues. A match with the Dog and Pig is logical as the Dog is sensitive and the Pig can endure hardships. Avoid the match with the Rooster as the Rabbit cannot tolerate the Rooster’s arrogant and conceited character. LuckThe outlook for the Rabbit’s luck is good this year. There is chance for career development. Friends will give assistance to you. When there is a good opportunity, you may borrow friends’ luck to move forward. These friends must be born in the year of Pig, Dog and Goat. You must start saving some funds now, otherwise when opportunity strikes; you will be lack of capital. CareerIn this Dog year, there is a benefactor in Rabbit’s life. There would be a major breakthrough in career advancement. Summer and Autumn season seems unfavorable. Spring season would the best to reap profits. The most favorable positions to develop your career are in places like the East, North, Southeast, North, Northeast and Southwest. Fortune LuckMoney luck is good for the Rabbit. It is a pity that there is a bad constellation present. If you do not handle your finances well, you may end up loosing a small wealth. The unexpected wealth(lucky draw, 4D, Toto) will be favorable in the Winter season. Place some bets on personal numbers like house, car license, telephone and etc. HealthThe well being of the Rabbit is overall fine. Pay attention to the diet. Excessive dine and wine is not encouraged as it may bring damages to the body. Do more outdoor sports. Luck will naturally come to you once you are healthy and fit. Copyright © 2006 by Master Gwee
Fulu Geomancy Centre 349 Geylang Road Singapore 389370
Tel : (65) 6841 7555 Fax : (65) 6842 7555 Website :www.orientalfortune21.com
Email : orientalfortune21@yahoo.com.sg
RomanceSocial life for the Rabbit will be more active this year. There will be outstanding performance in social gatherings. The Peach Blossom Constellation appears in Lunar calendar November. For the singles, you are able to meet your ideal partner. A word of caution, married Rabbits should know your limits and not flirt around or else when the boat capsized, you would end up with nothing. Academic There will be excellent performance in the studies. Do not overwork. Pay attention to your health. While taking vacations, do not forget to make new friends and enhance your general knowledge. Ways to avoid disastersVisit www.orientalfortune21.com to seek for answers or email Master Gwee @ orientalfortune21@yahoo.com.sg for guidance. Auspicious Months Lunar Calendar February, June, September and October Inauspicious Months Lunar Calendar March, May, August and November

[siewjang]

:h: Still no good news about Rooster with Rabbit. :(

[alfred98]

:h: Still no good news about Rooster with Rabbit. :(
Not good for marriage mah, friends no problem mah.. :D

[siewjang]

Not good for marriage mah, friends no problem mah.. :D
:D Every year also they say the same thing. Me no heck care liao. Somemore every year say I will have 3rd party. Until now still don't have :( I think I should jia yu, jia yu! :rolleyes:

[alfred98]

:D Every year also they say the same thing. Me no heck care liao. Somemore every year say I will have 3rd party. Until now still don't have :( I think I should jia yu, jia yu! :rolleyes:
I see what u mean. But this 3rd party don't fall down from the heaven leh. U need to be looking for it lor.. :p

[siewjang]

Look and no action also cannot right? ;)

[alfred98]

Look and no action also cannot right? ;)
Find one first mah the horrorscpoe said easy mah. Then action lor...

[siewjang]

okok. Wish me luck. Must jia yu, jia yu.

[alfred98]

okok. Wish me luck. Must jia yu, jia yu.
Ok Jian yu, jian yu. Who's the candidate leh... :cool:

[siewjang]

Wait la. Let me start to buaya first. So far, i'm still loyal to Buaya Trainee. :cool:

[Chris C]

Wait la. Let me start to buaya first. So far, i'm still loyal to Buaya Trainee. :cool:
:laugh: .....Jang really admire your loyalty....... ;) ......and BT must be feeling really proud.....

[alfred98]

:.....Jang really admire your loyalty....... ;) ......and BT must be feeling really proud.....
Kindly some one explain here. :confused: :confused: :sus:

[siewjang]

What do you called a female crocodile?

[alfred98]

What do you called a female crocodile?
Buaya Betina??? :unsure: :blink:

[siewjang]

hehe.. you don't buaya me ok?

[alfred98]

hehe.. you don't buaya me ok?
No leh don't dare leh. I only need some history here. Who is buaya trainee that's all.

[siewjang]

I don't normally do homework for ppl, but hor.... as a respect to my senior I'll do it. Check out our Buaya Trainee (http://www.acs-sitiawan.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3106&page=6&pp=30) here. :)

[alfred98]

I don't normally do homework for ppl, but hor.... as a respect to my senior I'll do it. Check out our Buaya Trainee (http://www.acs-sitiawan.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3106&page=6&pp=30) here. :)
Buaya Trainee had to be trained quick alots leh. The face look like very innocent looking...Sent for army training also... :D

[siewjang]

Eh, I like the face like that. Very cute and hensem. So si mun somemore. But I think he need to pump up somemore.

[alfred98]

Eh, I like the face like that. Very cute and hensem. So si mun somemore. But I think he need to pump up somemore.
Sent for national service lahhhhh... :laugh:

[siewjang]

He missed them by few years. Wasted!

[alfred98]

He missed them by few years. Wasted!
Then join reserved army lor any time one... :D

[siewjang]

He's still a virgin. Don't think he's ready to waste his manhood like this. :laugh: errr... must stop talking about him liao. later ppl thought i really buaya betina. :o

[alfred98]

He's still a virgin. Don't think he's ready to waste his manhood like this. :laugh: errr... must stop talking about him liao. later ppl thought i really buaya betina. :o
Hahaha change to Buaya Betina Hijacker lor....

[alfred98]

Shut-up
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?The Dog of course .... at least it will shut up after you let him in!

Three Children
A couple had three children.Two of them were bright, smart, and handsome but the third child was dull, ugly, and backward. One day the hubby got suspicious and asked:
"Tell me the truth, dear. Is this third child really mine?"
"Yes, dear, " replied the wife, " .... but the other two are not.

Qualities of a Wife
When a bachelor marries, his wife has three qualities -----
She is an economist in the kitchen, an aristocrat in the living room and a devil in bed.
After a few years, sure enough the three qualities remain, but not in the same order anymore. She becomes an aristocrat in the kitchen, a devil in the living room and an economist in bed.

Wishing Well
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned immediately. The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled and said :" Gosh ! It really works! "

Plain Lazy
The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English ---- what is wrong with me ? " " Well, in plain English ", the doctor replied, " you're just lazy." " Okay, " said the man. "Now give me the really complicated medical term so that I can tell my wife. "

Wedding Anniversary
I asked my wife:" Where do you want to go on our anniversary?" She said : " Oh ! Somewhere I have never been before!" I told her: "How about the kitchen?"

The Marriage is .....
How do most men define marriage? An expensive way to get laundry done for free.

Happiest Hour
During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband, "Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn't talk for an hour?" The hubby replied:"Yes, honey, that was indeed the happiest hour of my married life."

Holding Hands
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops!

Hehehehhehe :laugh:

[Chris C]

:laugh: .....too free ah, loctor??? :cheesy:

[alfred98]

Hahahha. wife lorrrr...funny isn't it tahhhh. :laugh:

[ungsutiong]

He's still a virgin. Don't think he's ready to waste his manhood like this. :laugh: errr... must stop talking about him liao. later ppl thought i really buaya betina. :o
ha ha ha Do u have a training manual for trainee buaya? How to prevent nose-bleed? How to prevent drooling?

[alfred98]

A store that sells husbands to single women opens where a woman may go to choose from many available men.

At the entrance is a description of how the store operates.



There are only six floors. It states that the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch:

As you open the door to any floor you may choose any man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.:laugh: :laugh:



So, Jane decides to go to the Husband Store to find herself a mate.



She gets to the first floor and the sign says:



"Floor 1 - These men have jobs."



She figures she can do better, so she goes up the next flight.



"Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids."



Not bad, she decides, but what about companionship? She moves on.



"Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking."



Wow, she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the 4th floor and sign reads:



"Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework."



"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"



Still, she goes to the 5th floor, where the sign reads:



"Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak."



She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign

reads:



Floor 6 - You are visitor #46,012 to this floor today. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step when you exit the building and have a nice day!

[alfred98]

Polish Divorce
>
> A Polish man married an American girl after he had been in the
>USA a year or so and, although his English was far from perfect,
>they got on very well. One day, though, he rushed into a lawyer's
>office and asked him if he could arrange an immediate divorce for
>him. The lawyer said that the speed of getting a divorce would
>depend on the circumstances and asked him the following questions:
>
>
>> LAWYER: Have you any grounds?
>
> POLE: Ja, Ja, an acre and half and a nice little home with 3
>bedrooms.
>
> LAWYER: No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
>
> POLE: It is made of concrete, brick and mortar.
>
>
> LAWYER: Does either of you have a real grudge?
>
> POLE: No. We have a two-car carport and have never really
>needed one.
>
> LAWYER: I mean, what are your relations like?
>
> POLE: All my relations are in Poland!
>
>
> LAWYER: Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
>
> POLE: Ja, we have hi fidelity stereo set & DVD player with 6.1
>sound. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answers to your
>questions is yes.
>
>
>
>
> LAWYER: No. I mean does your wife beat you up?
>
> POLE: No. I'm always up before her.
>
>
>
>
> LAWYER: Is your wife a nagger?
>
> POLE: No, she white.
>
>
> LAWYER: WHY do you want this divorce?
>
> POLE: She going to kill me.
>
>
> LAWYER: What makes you think that?
>
> POLE: I got proof.
>
>
> LAWYER: What kind of proof?
>
> POLE: She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at the drug
>store and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, it says, "Polish
>Remover."
>

[BohPian]

(A mindless poem composed for a dull afternoon)

The old town of my youth
I yearn for thy quiet solitude
For thy carefree ways of life
And thy pure simple delights

As I strolled by thy serene stream
All my sweetest memories thee bring
Of flying kites on a lazy afternoon
Of savoring ais kacang as the jukebox booms

Oh old school, how I missed thee too
The friends I made, the pranks we played
The canes that left me blue black and red

Of girls how can one forget
With eyes and smiles that captivate
Had I more courage to woo than wait
Till it was twenty years too late

Now long is my journey far is the road
A restless wanderer of the globe
When my soul’s weary, my heart’s grown old
May I return to thy humble abode.

[alfred98]

ME : What do you want to eat??
GF : Anything will do......
ME : Ok, chicken rice then.
GF : But I don't feel like having rice leh....
ME : Ok, mee goreng then.....
GF : Don't want, too oily.....
ME : Fishball noddle soup....
GF : Yeeeee...So plain....
ME : Then what you want???
GF : Anything lor.......

[TingMS]

ME : What do you want to eat??
GF : Anything will do......
ME : Ok, chicken rice then.
GF : But I don't feel like having rice leh....
ME : Ok, mee goreng then.....
GF : Don't want, too oily.....
ME : Fishball noddle soup....
GF : Yeeeee...So plain....
ME : Then what you want???
GF : Anything lor.......


hahahhhaaa..

thought it only happens to my family...:laugh:

[andrewjpan]

Shut-up
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?The Dog of course .... at least it will shut up after you let him in!

Three Children
A couple had three children.Two of them were bright, smart, and handsome but the third child was dull, ugly, and backward. One day the hubby got suspicious and asked:
"Tell me the truth, dear. Is this third child really mine?"
"Yes, dear, " replied the wife, " .... but the other two are not.

Qualities of a Wife
When a bachelor marries, his wife has three qualities -----
She is an economist in the kitchen, an aristocrat in the living room and a devil in bed.
After a few years, sure enough the three qualities remain, but not in the same order anymore. She becomes an aristocrat in the kitchen, a devil in the living room and an economist in bed.

Wishing Well
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned immediately. The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled and said :" Gosh ! It really works! "

Plain Lazy
The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English ---- what is wrong with me ? " " Well, in plain English ", the doctor replied, " you're just lazy." " Okay, " said the man. "Now give me the really complicated medical term so that I can tell my wife. "

Wedding Anniversary
I asked my wife:" Where do you want to go on our anniversary?" She said : " Oh ! Somewhere I have never been before!" I told her: "How about the kitchen?"

The Marriage is .....
How do most men define marriage? An expensive way to get laundry done for free.

Happiest Hour
During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband, "Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn't talk for an hour?" The hubby replied:"Yes, honey, that was indeed the happiest hour of my married life."

Holding Hands
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops!

Hehehehhehe :laugh:
alfred... i think we got the same e-mail...

[andrewjpan]

A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself last year, at a gala event,
hosted by alocal liberal arts college.

There was no shortage of extremely young,idealistic ladies in
attendance, one of whom approached the SergeantMajor for conversation.
She said, "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very
seriousman. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am," the Sergeant Major said, "Just serious by nature."
"The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "Itlooks
like you have seen a lot of action."

The Sergeant Major's short reply was, "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."
The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation,
said,"Youknow, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy
yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.
Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take
thisthewrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"
The Sergeant Major looked at her and replied, "1955."

She said, "Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and
quittaking everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955! Shetook
his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to"relax" him
several times.

Afterwards, and panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chestand
said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"
The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his
matter-of-factvoice, "I hope not, it's only 21.30 now.

[alfred98]

Big Balls

A tourist is in Spain, and goes to a fancy restaurant for dinner. As he looks around, he notices a diner being served a beautifully garnished dish with two gigantic meatballs in the middle. When the waiter asks him for his order, the man asks him about the meatball dish. The waiter explains that the meatballs are bull's testicles, and when the bull loses the bullfight, the bull is brought to the restaurant, and this beautiful dish is made.

The diner tells the waiter that he wants the bulls testicles for dinner, but the waiter tells him that only one bull a day is brought to the restaurant, but he can have it tommorrow. The diner agrees. The next day the diner goes to the restaurant, and orders the testicle dish. When his food is brought out, he notices that the meatballs are extremely small. He mentions this to the waiter, and the waiter replies, ''Well sir you have to understand, sometimes the bull wins''.:p