Dino
09-18-2005, 01:54 AM
Candidates:
#1 Nazlan
Reasons why he should be nominated
1. I cant do anything and am utterly hopeless, so politics is natural to me
2. I need the cronism money
3. I have a fetish for being hugged by large h-AP-py women
4. …errr I have a cute tush?
5. ....actually, I don’t.
#2 Hisham
Reasons why he should be nominated
1) All my cabinet members will only have basic salary of RM1,500. Monthly bonus will depend on monthly review of job performance and amaount of "reputation points" given by citizens, an idea translated from the ACS Sitiawan forums.
2) Sitiawan will be the capital of the new United Federation of Asia.
3) Anyone who drives a car like a moron will be smeared with syrup and tied to an anthill.
4) Corruption will be investigated by a board of people, whose members will consist of citizens rotated randomly every month. They have to be transparent and have their itinerary, daily planning, and results displayed publicly in newspapers. People found guilty of corruption by this board will be put in a display truck naked and brought around the country for display to the public.
5) Anyone that has anything to do with any reality shows will be hunted down like vermin and fried with a flamethrower.
#3 Dino
Ok laaa.....I nominate myself....
1) Get rid of censorship in public media. Everything would be rated accordingly.
2) Get rid of monopolies and promote competition among companies. Let market factors decide the flow of things.
3) Religion and Govt is a no-no....
4) Equality opportunities for all citizens.
5) Get rid of immigrants who do not respect the countries culture.
6) Govt. agencies needs to be more efficient and serve its people well. No more tea time 5-6 times a day.
#4 Dontbullshit
a. make sure all the Sitiawan ppl be given any kind of gomen contracts. No outsiders will be considered for gomen contracts;
b. Sitiawan ppl. will be given total exemption of any forms of taxes as long as I and my decendants remain PM;
c. remain power forever and ever, AMEN. I am a strong supporter for MCA (My Children Also);
d. to wayang kulit in order to protect my pledge as stated in items (a) and (b). I pledge to be a better wayang kulit than anyone in this BOLEHLAND. Go away "Tear No More" Johnson & Johnson Shampoo advertisement!!;
e. I pledge to give unlimited wealth to those sitiawanese who 'scratch my back'. I pledge to 'hantam' those who are not supportive of any of my policies and decisions and my family, of course.
#5 Sila
1) i'll make sure they grow back the Rubber Trees and stop reclaiming Mangrove swamps in Sitiawan
2) nazgul helmets will be given to the worthy as a reward
3) ACS will be declared a historical landmark and protected from any demolition/etc. forever and ever and ever
4) all other schools in Sitiawan will be declared inferior and we get to laugh at them in public
5) convicted criminals will be made to hold hands and jump off Wisma Ganda (popcorn and soda will be sold at these events to raise money for the Sitiawan government)
6) if anybody disagrees with me, we bury them up to their waists in the mangrove swamp and pelt them with rubber seeds (again, popcorn and soda will be sold at these events to raise money for the Sitiawan government)
7) the world will bow to the might of the Sitiawan government - we will rule them all by being so farny that nobody will oppose us
8) as PM, i take my responsibilities so seriously i will have to take 6 months paid vacation every year
#6 Lava Gal
1/ We've had years of older (read as wise) people becoming PM...time for some youth action!
2/ SITIAWAN will be a HOTSPOT...no kidding....even whole of Manjung District for that matter +++ Tax exemption...coz that's the CTA1 in d country (KL ibu negeri...something to rethink of!)
3/ This forum will be our country's official forum...with ACSians of coz having a slight upper hand (cronyism...nehh...u guys will all be my right wings)
4/ Before melaksanakan any undang-undang, will conduct a public poll & gather opinion on the issue, especially from people who are involved (ie: change in school hours --> consult students & teachers...not people who sit goyang-kaki up there making up d rulez ni )
5/ Our nation isn't sexist right? give a gal a chance to prove leadership, man!!
#1 Nazlan
Reasons why he should be nominated
1. I cant do anything and am utterly hopeless, so politics is natural to me
2. I need the cronism money
3. I have a fetish for being hugged by large h-AP-py women
4. …errr I have a cute tush?
5. ....actually, I don’t.
#2 Hisham
Reasons why he should be nominated
1) All my cabinet members will only have basic salary of RM1,500. Monthly bonus will depend on monthly review of job performance and amaount of "reputation points" given by citizens, an idea translated from the ACS Sitiawan forums.
2) Sitiawan will be the capital of the new United Federation of Asia.
3) Anyone who drives a car like a moron will be smeared with syrup and tied to an anthill.
4) Corruption will be investigated by a board of people, whose members will consist of citizens rotated randomly every month. They have to be transparent and have their itinerary, daily planning, and results displayed publicly in newspapers. People found guilty of corruption by this board will be put in a display truck naked and brought around the country for display to the public.
5) Anyone that has anything to do with any reality shows will be hunted down like vermin and fried with a flamethrower.
#3 Dino
Ok laaa.....I nominate myself....
1) Get rid of censorship in public media. Everything would be rated accordingly.
2) Get rid of monopolies and promote competition among companies. Let market factors decide the flow of things.
3) Religion and Govt is a no-no....
4) Equality opportunities for all citizens.
5) Get rid of immigrants who do not respect the countries culture.
6) Govt. agencies needs to be more efficient and serve its people well. No more tea time 5-6 times a day.
#4 Dontbullshit
a. make sure all the Sitiawan ppl be given any kind of gomen contracts. No outsiders will be considered for gomen contracts;
b. Sitiawan ppl. will be given total exemption of any forms of taxes as long as I and my decendants remain PM;
c. remain power forever and ever, AMEN. I am a strong supporter for MCA (My Children Also);
d. to wayang kulit in order to protect my pledge as stated in items (a) and (b). I pledge to be a better wayang kulit than anyone in this BOLEHLAND. Go away "Tear No More" Johnson & Johnson Shampoo advertisement!!;
e. I pledge to give unlimited wealth to those sitiawanese who 'scratch my back'. I pledge to 'hantam' those who are not supportive of any of my policies and decisions and my family, of course.
#5 Sila
1) i'll make sure they grow back the Rubber Trees and stop reclaiming Mangrove swamps in Sitiawan
2) nazgul helmets will be given to the worthy as a reward
3) ACS will be declared a historical landmark and protected from any demolition/etc. forever and ever and ever
4) all other schools in Sitiawan will be declared inferior and we get to laugh at them in public
5) convicted criminals will be made to hold hands and jump off Wisma Ganda (popcorn and soda will be sold at these events to raise money for the Sitiawan government)
6) if anybody disagrees with me, we bury them up to their waists in the mangrove swamp and pelt them with rubber seeds (again, popcorn and soda will be sold at these events to raise money for the Sitiawan government)
7) the world will bow to the might of the Sitiawan government - we will rule them all by being so farny that nobody will oppose us
8) as PM, i take my responsibilities so seriously i will have to take 6 months paid vacation every year
#6 Lava Gal
1/ We've had years of older (read as wise) people becoming PM...time for some youth action!
2/ SITIAWAN will be a HOTSPOT...no kidding....even whole of Manjung District for that matter +++ Tax exemption...coz that's the CTA1 in d country (KL ibu negeri...something to rethink of!)
3/ This forum will be our country's official forum...with ACSians of coz having a slight upper hand (cronyism...nehh...u guys will all be my right wings)
4/ Before melaksanakan any undang-undang, will conduct a public poll & gather opinion on the issue, especially from people who are involved (ie: change in school hours --> consult students & teachers...not people who sit goyang-kaki up there making up d rulez ni )
5/ Our nation isn't sexist right? give a gal a chance to prove leadership, man!!